A Different Kind of Trust …
Trust. A word that tends to get tossed around a good bit, it gets taken advantage of and totally obliterated in some instances.
Door locks. Passwords. Iris scanning. Bio-Metrics in general. All to “Verify, but Trust.”
My longtime friend and author, Jeffrey Gitomer wrote an excellent book on the subject – Little Teal Book of Trust. In this work, Gitomer lays out some very foundational things to ensure you know what trust looks like and feels like—as a giver and a receiver. In fact, Jeffrey gives us 23.5 characteristics of trustworthy people. Yes, I said 23.5, my man always gives a little extra, his .5’s are worth gold.
These are not “rocket-science types of things, a lot of common sense needs to be applied, and a desire to be in a trusted advisor role is near the top of the list, especially if you are providing a service to someone. As he says in the book, “To get trust, first give trust.” Pick up a copy of the book for more on this topic and much needed element of life.
Now picture this in your head. You are at the airport early (sorry, maybe that is just me), you grab coffee, you meander your way to your gate, let’s say it is gate E-98, which is usually how I roll. You find an open chair, wait, that power outlet actually works? Score.
So, then you sit, adjust, unzip, ear buds, and start doing whatever it is that you do while you wait. Let’ say you are somewhere between listening to The Smiths, How Soon is Now?, and The Nick Shirley Podcast when all of a sudden, the person sitting across from you starts motioning with their arms and inaudibly talking, as you have decided to hear lessons of the day from Morrisey versus Nick Shirley—you now have to pop out the ear buds to hear these words. “Are you going to be here for a few
minutes? I wanted to leave all my stuff here and run to the restroom. Will you watch it for me?”
Hello! A total stranger just left me or any other random person that would be sitting there if I weren’t, to watch their stuff! Stuff—stuff that may include, clothing, medications, electronics of numerous varieties, cash, wallet, insurance information, bank debit cards, and God only knows what else they have stuffed into their carry-on and or backpack. It just seems crazy to me.
Think about it, we just left our homes, maybe 60 or 90 minutes prior to this moment, locked the doors to the house to keep strangers out and away from your other stuff. We then drove or Ubered to the airport with the doors on the car locked, went through a plethora of security, including a possible bag search so they could look at your stuff, and now we just decide that the person in the chair across from us is The One that we trust to “watch our stuff”?
Ludicrous, I say.
Yes, I am adding unsolicited humor to the equation here, but when this happened to me recently it really gave me a reason to take a minute or two and ponder just exactly how and when TRUST in extended and why.
Steven M.R. Covey authored a book entitled The Speed of Trust. In this book he teaches how, when, and why trust is established, transferred, and shared. The situational differences of when trust “needs to be there” varies, this is my believe. Let me explain a bit. If you really have to go to the rest room at the airport, and your truly do not want to take your stuff with you, then you and only you must decide which fellow traveler you will ask to watch your belongings. Not always a big deal, maybe you are going home from a trip and the only thing in your backpack is indeed dirty laundry, low level of trust required in this instance.
Now, if you left an open top cup of coffee beside your stuff, do you trust that nothing gets dumped in it? No one, and I mean no one wants to get “roofied” at an airport! How about hiring a contractor for your home plumbing job? How are you developing trust with them, him, her, or the company in general? Can you leave them alone in the back of the house while you are up front tending to the kids?
Buying a home, applying for a new job, having a candid conversation with your boss … There is no right or wrong answer to any of these scenarios. We as humans, all have our unique filters as to what works for us … In any given situation.
Covey, the son, not the Seven Habits Dad, gave us a nice paper here to ponder – Speed of Trust, have a look at it. Think about the situations in your life when trust is an absolute must and those situations that you trust but verify, and those situations you find yourself in where that still, small voice in your guy says “No!.”
Yes, we all entered the airport through the same security check points, but remember, the person you ask to watch your stuff is also figuring out if they should trust you or not. I am sure there are thieves and villains who go through the security line with me on each day of travel … I just don’t want to bait them into action. The funny part is, they are probably wondering, are you setting them up? Is it a ploy to deceive? Usually not, but it does make you sip your coffee from a more curious mindset!
Until Next Time, Stay Sanguine
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